Letting Go… When my Mom passed just over a year ago I threw myself into settling her estate, looking after her Mom, looking after my brother, and working too many hours. I didn’t want to feel the hurt of loosing her and I was so afraid that if I “let go” I would forget the beautiful woman that loved and believed in me so much.
I remember a chilly day that we sat out on the deck talking and she made me promise that I would go back to Costa Rica for a vacation. She knew I had fallen in love with this place and wanted to make sure I went back. Then she said something that I will never forget and made my heart hurt, she said “When you go back to Costa Rica I will send all the beautiful butterflies to see you and you will know that I am there with you. Now promise me you will go back.” I reluctantly promised. She passed in April that year and in January of the following year I kept my promise and went back. I spent ten days by myself in the most beautiful place on earth. On the next to last day I finally found the courage to feel everything I had worked so hard to stuff. Sitting quietly looking out at the jungle and the ocean in the distance the first butterfly appeared. This butterfly was a brilliant yellow and it fluttered right up to me – my Mom had a car this color and we all made fun of her because it was so bright, but she loved this car and put up with our making fun. Within minutes there were at least 20 butterflies of all size and color fluttering around and that’s when it all poured out. I knew she had kept her promise too and I also realized that letting go didn’t mean forgetting it meant understanding and would bring peace to both of us. Never have I felt so empowered and light. Now when I think of that chilly day and our conversation, it warms my heart and makes me smile.
I realized that day that my Mom had been a huge inspiration in my life. She had always been one to encourage me to follow my dreams…and some of my dreams were HUGE.
I learned from this experience that letting go is a positive. It allows us to move on and experience all that this wonderful life has to offer. Recognizing that things – people, decisions, material items, feelings – aren’t mean to be held onto is difficult, but when we allow ourselves to let go we allow ourselves to grow.
Is there something you’re holding onto that is holding you back from growing? If so, take a moment to identify what or who it is and find the courage to let go. I promise you it will open the doors to a whole new world…and you will find happiness.
Have a beautiful weekend! ~Pamela